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Why Would I Get Rid of Something I Love?

What am I referring to? My debt! Yes, call me crazy, but I love my debt. Why would I get rid of it? My debt has helped me in so many ways, he doesn't bother me, so why chuck him?

You know those annoying ads on TV, especially late night, "Are you in debt? Get rid of your debt in 3 easy steps"? UGH, get rid of your own debt, I love mine.

The ads don't tell you that once you do this, your debt is gone, but guess who goes with your debt? Your credit cards! They pick up and leave you. You can no longer count on them for endless shopping, dining out, or screenwriting contests. It is like you don't exist to them anymore. They once loved you, but now they side with the debt you just chucked and leave you.
Debt has always been loyal to me, so the very idea of my leaving my debt makes me sad. What would I do without him? My life would be different. My debt defines me. I can't imagine being without someone who has helped me get the things in life that I deserve.

Shoes, handbags, fabulous scarves, pretty dresses, belts, jewelry, hats, and any little thing I desire. Without my debt, I wouldn't have any of these things and the television ad wants me to turn my back on my debt just like that, without even saying "Thank you."
My debt is helping me build my credit rating and why does that count? So I can get more stuff, and actually help my debt grow more then I can be defined by larger debt and larger stuff, like an apartment on the Upper West Side, or a cool-kitchy condo in Los Angeles, and maybe a new car. Yay! If I got rid of my debt, I wouldn't be able to do any of this for a long time.

So please stop telling me to get rid of my debt, you get rid of yours, mine is happy right where he is. We have a solid long lasting relationship.

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