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Showing posts from September, 2009

The Parking Machine~A Fictional Story

Hello there, how are you tonight? I'm good, thanks so much for asking. . .oops, you didn't.

You didn't care that I have been working 24/7 for as long as I can remember. You didn't seem to notice the thick pink goo that is making it's home on my right side. You didn't say hello, you didn't say goodbye, you didn't hardly even look at me.

Your cell phone rang and you picked it up started talking and walked away from me. You talked for what seemed like hours, about your car and the fact that you were stuck behind some idiot on the 405. You didn't care enough to even glance my way as you spoke into the phone so intently.

You and your friends all laughing and carrying on, not even noticing me in right in front of you.

I do think that boyfriend of yours is a complete asshole by the way, he also didn't say hello to me, and he was checking out the blond girl's ass as you turned to answer that damn phone. His friends all joking with him about you and you …

Meatballs Kicking John Mcclain's Arse!

"Yippee ki yay, motherfucker!!!" ~Just Sayin'

Back in the day Bruce Willis films would dominate the box office. I am not sure if it is his age or the ridiculous premise of Surrogates, that kept him down this weekend, but I suspect it is all about Meatballs. People want a good story plain and simple. Smoke, mirrors and good looking chicks are not enough for today's demanding audience. Jennifer's dead Body was also left in the path of Meatballs.


To say that I am not a huge fan of 3D animated films would be putting it nicely. It isn't just because the 3D craze has basically ripped my career out of my hands and given to directly to computer nerds that don't know a thing about story or animation

**** Pixar being the exception to this****

I just don't like the way it looks. I actually can't stand it.

You ever meet someone and you just get that feeling? You know the one, like fingers on a chalk board that actually makes you want to jump out of your own skin? …

A Pet Peeve Called, Pyramid

Everyone knows that writers, artists, actors, basically any creative types are usually out of money, low on funds, or skint as I like to call it. I really hate when people try to take advantage of that situation and then invite you to join a pyramid scheme. If you have to pay X amount a month and get all your friends to pay and they get their friends to do it and so forth, it is a pyramid scheme. Plain and simple.

I am so sick to death of these people trying to explain how they made millions off that and you can have it too, as long as you pay.

They are playing on our need for money and fear of being hungry and homeless to do so.

I could have thumped one of my friends last year for inviting me to his house last spring only to walk into a pyramid scheme party!!

It was so pissed that I almost walked out, but I endured it, just not to hurt him.

Today I saw a job posting on my FB through on of my FB friends and this person used Donald Trump's name. I thought maybe Mr. Trump had a new show …

Socially Accepted Behavior

Today I was innocently walking my dog at half seven in the morning when I spotted him. I tried not to look, but I couldn't tear my own head from turning in his direction. Like there was a force bigger than me keeping my head turned towards him and I had to absorb all that was there to be seen.

He was a 60 year old man clearly suffering from delusions of grandeur when it came to his looks. I know that I think I look young, but I always try~try being the operative word here~to act age appropriate. This man was outside in a Speedo watering his lawn! The image of his wrinkled up body, sagging skin, gray hair on his back, his white socks half way up his calves and his throw-back sandals from the '70s will forever be burned on my brain.

You might think, aw that is sweet an old man just being himself.

NO!

He was not an old man, rather an older man, huge difference.

And to add serious insult to injury, when he noticed me he stood up, leaned arching his back displaying his "manhood&quo…

Stories From Home

This is from an article/review of Gabriel Byrne's new doc, Stories From Home.
I copied it because I wanted to write a review of the actor, and his doc., but this person did a great job and pretty much summed up how I feel about the film, Gabriel and myself. The filmed moved me and stirred emotions that I haven't felt in years. Gabriel spoke afterward, and talked about "loss", which I know a great deal about. He said, "you are never the same after suffering loss, there is before loss and after loss". How I wish I didn't know what he was talking about, but I do and it meant something to me to hear that someone else knows EXACTLY how I feel. I too, just like the writer of this article, will watch this over and over and discover new things about myself in doing so.

Though provoking, personal and entertaining, I highly recommend you see this.

THE ARTICLE:

As I approach the end of this unbelievable year, I realize with some certainty and a bit of nostalic sadness…

The Good Wife off to a Good Start!

The Good Wife, CBS Tuesdays, is off to a good start. ER's Julianna Margulies, whose last role in a series, Canterbury's Law~never got off the ground, takes a chance with another lawyer role in this season's political/courtroom drama.

Margulies stars as Alicia Florrick, humiliated wife of Chicago prosecutor Peter Florrick, Mr. Big~John Preston~the ever so fabulous and still in style, Chris Noth, who has just landed himself in jail under a cloud of political and sexual scandals. In order to support her two children, Alicia returns to the workforce as a defense attorney in a prestigious law firm. Josh Charles, Matt Czuchry (Gilmore Girls) and Christine Baranski round of this cast.

I wasn't surprised equally as much as I was surprised to see Tony and Ridley Scott on the credits.

The show takes place in Chicago, but as far as I know is shot right here in Los Angeles, so keep your eye out for palm trees, CA plates, and skinny pizza. ;0)

I can recommend this to anyone who likes a…

Afraid of the Canyons? STAY OUT!

Hello Los Angeles folks. Don't you hate it when you are trying to get from the Valley to Beverly Hills, West Hollywood, Santa Monica, West L.A., or anywhere "over the hill"~to be fair, in either direction, and some complete git pulls up in front of you on Coldwater Canyon (Beverly), Mulholland Drive, or Laurel (Crescent Hts) and goes about 10 mph??

I have to just scream about it for a second... are you ready?

AAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!

So to those people that do that lemme say these words.

IF YOU ARE AFRAID TO DRIVE THE CANYONS PLEASE TAKE YOUR SLOW STUPID ASS ONTO THE FREEWAY!

The freeways move nice and slow, so you should fit in perfectly. Most days during rush hour the freeways hardly move.

The thing is, I am not one to get road rage of any kind. If I make a bone head move like get onto the 101, the 5, the 405, the 134, or the 10 between the hours of 7-10 am or 4-7 pm, then I am prepared to sit and sit I shall. I turn up the radio, return phone calls (ON MY HANDS FREE)…

If It's So Damn Easy, You F***ing Do It

This is from an article, I Will Not Read Your Fucking Script.


~There's a great story about Pablo Picasso. Some guy told Picasso he'd pay him to draw a picture on a napkin. Picasso whipped out a pen and banged out a sketch, handed it to the guy, and said, "One million dollars, please."

"A million dollars?" the guy exclaimed. "That only took you thirty seconds!"

"Yes," said Picasso. "But it took me fifty years to learn how to draw that in thirty seconds."~

What is GREAT about this, is that so many people are always asking us artists to drawing for free, or low pay and their logic.. "it only takes a second"..If I had a dollar for every time some idiot out in the real world did this me, I would be rich beyond belief.

True story, a couple years ago I had been paid a 500 hundred dollars from a TV actor to design and draw a card for his friend and co-star. It only took me a day and one of my non artist friends was so insulted by …