Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Crazed! Insane! Slammed! Busy!

So I am probably going to not be writing as much for the next couple of weeks because I am swamped-or in LA we say "crazed", but it is great!

I am writing a new sitcom that I LOVE, it is so funny. Yay.

I am taking a comedy writing class for the next 10 days that requires I do one assignment a night.

I am working on a feature film-animation-the day job

I am working on a short-animation-the day job

I am signed up for a bunch of other writer panels &

I just got a mentor-the awesome Megan Crane-through the Chick Lit Writer's group I belong to, so will be on the novel as well..

Things are AWESOME, I am just busy!!

Sunday, June 27, 2010

What Was She Thinking?



OMG! How many Asian orphans had to bleed their fingers to the bone making this sequin nightmare just so she could look this stupid?

Do I really need to say more? Okay I will say just a bit more.

She is too pale to pull this off, the shoes are WAAAAAAAAY to high for her, and the skirt is too short.

Just sayin'

Saturday, June 26, 2010

Doing Nothing!


Some days I just love to do nothing. Isn't that terrible? What a waste. But to be fair, it isn't really nothing as it is enjoying life and my nothing usually consists of running all over town, shopping, doing errands, hanging with my pooch and doing either drawing or writing.

The art of relaxing! :0)

Hope you are all having a great weekend.

XOXO

*not sure who did this drawing-found on the web. I like to add visuals but don't always have time to draw them.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Save the Rest For Tomorrow

Ever come home late, say from a networking event and need to eat something, so you grab some pasta and or possibly stir fry rice? You know, something you can whip up and then "eat the rest tomorrow" because let's face it, it's late, you aren't even going to have one serving, much less the whole lot.

I like to call this: The One Serving Plan Goes Awry.

It goes like this, you make the plan for just a nibble, because one serving is usually so small you couldn't fill even the a 5 year old's tummy with it. Okay, so you have the plan, you make the food, you take a small amount and put into your bowl, plate, cup whatever, then you put the rest in a container to store overnight in the fridge for tomorrow. "Yay! I won't have to cook lunch now!" You say to yourself as you walk way to have the rest-now.

All of a sudden your bowl is empty! What? How did that? What? It's empty? But I am still hungry! So you walk back to the container, because it is just sitting on the counter-"Cooling off"- and take a little bit more, but you don't eat it right away, you carefully take the spoon and smooth out the top of the container, so it still has the illusion of being full.

The same bloody thing happens again, but this time, you are feeling a little more satisfied, and you know if you just eat a "tiny" bit more, you will be done for the night.

You go back to the kitchen, and take half of what is left and put it into your bowl. YUMM-EEE!

You finish in two gulps and place your empty bowl in the sink. You look at the container and think it is still a smidge too hot to put in the fridge so you start doing your dishes, and it is there steaming right behind you. You grab the lid, close it and place in the fridge for tomorrow.

Dishes are done, shoes are off, you sit down after a long day and press "recorded shows" on your DVR. Top Chef has a new episode, so you watch.

After the Quickfire Challenge is up, you go to the fridge, take out the container, sit back down on the couch and finish it, and possibly add some crisps to it. The empty-and now needs to be washed container that you didn't really need to use in the first place and now you are just wasting water killing the rain forest destroying the planet-container looks sad as you place it in the sink. It is at that moment that you realize that this is not the first time this has happened to you and the only thing left for tomorrow is another thing to wash.

Monday, June 21, 2010

Any Idiot w/ a Camera and or Microphone

Okay I am sorry but I have to say it. I can NOT stand video web blogs. When I am interested in something, I do not want to watch a video, or I would be watching a video. I like to read blogs, not watch them and sorry to say it, well okay I am not really sorry, but 99.9% of you who are doing these, do not know how to speak on camera and it is really hard to watch. As well, I can't stand blog pod casts that are replacing actual meetings with people.

This is happening more and more. There will be an add for a lunch meeting or talk, and then come to find out I have to log into my computer and listen to some damn radio talk? I want to connect with people in real life.


Workshops that are done this way have zero appeal for me and I really find it sad that any idiot with a camera thinks they are a talk show host and for me, it just doesn't work.

You tube has made it possible for independent film makers to get their work out there and that is great, but it is also ruining people's writing skills, because instead of writing a cool blog to get thoughts out there, people are standing in front of cameras and talking.

It is really an exciting time in the world, but it is equally depressing. People are always taking short cuts and the lazy way out.

As well, from a marketing POV, this whole web blog, video blog, pod casts whatever, suck majorly, because you don't have your audience's full attention. Computers crash and slug by. Phones ring, the dog barks, the doorbell rings, Sonny Corinthos shoots someone, IM pops up, Facebook is there, etc. etc. etc. If you were holding a workshop, meeting, or wrote something, you would have people's full attention. It is pretty simple if you think about it.

In any case, I know many of you probably disagree, but I could not stand to say something about it because it is driving me completely insane! I am just sayin' ~

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Busy Week!


I can't believe I haven't written since Monday!
Busy busy busy week. Have been working a lot on the film, as well as got a request for my novel, so had to print it out (how old school, but I love it) and send it. AND have been sending my episode of "Christine" out, so not so much time for blogging, but I got new glasses which make working a lot better and then writing is easier on the eyes as well!

Cheers and I will write a real blog this weekend. :0)

Monday, June 14, 2010

No Case of the Mondays!

Do you have a case of the Mondays?? I guess if I worked for the real version of this man in the middle of America with no prospects and nothing to look forward except being harassed about my missing TPS report, I might too-but thankfully I don't and so I am excited every week.

I love Mondays and really don't know why people are so down on them! Do you not have an awesome job that you love like I do? Did you settle for that steady paycheck instead of chasing your dream? Well then, you have no one to blame but yourself. Don't blame poor Monday.

Mondays are great because the week is just beginning and the possibilities are ENDLESS. You never know what could happen by Friday. For example. I am sending my book to Dublin today, so maybe by Friday I will have a publishing deal: that would be fast, but who knows? I am going out a couple nights this week, and so maybe by the end of the week I will have a new guy to hang out with? Maybe a job offer will come on Wed. Maybe someone will send my money. Clooney will finally read my script and buy it outright. I could win the lotto on Wed. Jake Gyllenhaal could fall madly in love with me. The point is, you never know what is going to happen!

I love Mondays because everything is less crowded from the post office to the bank to the suburban shopping malls and even Barnes & Noble. Everything is empty on Monday-thus making it easier for me to work.

In my job, the deadlines are always the weekend and or early Monday, so usually Monday is my rest day. Love it!!

Besides it just sounds happy...Monday. In my head it is yellow and sunny!

Friday, June 11, 2010

Effing Vegetarianism!



So, about a year ago, I decided to become a vegetarian for the second time in my life. Yes some of it was because a few of my friends were die hard vegans and on the case for no meat, no dairy, so I tried it.

Lemme start this with, I AM SUPER HEALTHY! I never get sick.

My roommate literally has a cold or flu about every 6 weeks and even had Swine flu last year and I didn't get it. I am healthy.

When vegetarian, I study and eat all the extra greens, chick peas, almonds, cashews, oatmeal etc.. to make up for losing vitamins. I even started taking supplements!

You would think that was enough!

Well, it wasn't.

Don't eat dairy?




my vitamin D is so low I have to be on a prescription for three months! Prescription vitamins! UGH...This is what I get from not drinking milk and cutting cheese out.

Don't eat meat-especially red? Well my iron and B vitamins are also super low.


One of my veggie friends is like, "well I don't believe in western medicine so I don't know my levels, but I feel fine" I feel fine as well, but I can't donate blood, and this could lead to other problems.

I am not telling you to be or not be a vegetarian, but rather, just that this is what happened to me.

I love veggies, I love them, so it isn't like I am going to not be healthy and start hanging out at fast food chains and shoveling down junk food, but I am going to change back to the way I was before I decided to be healthy-because I was healthier before all this trying to cut food out to be healthy.

So tonight, I will enjoy a cheeseburger-and hopefully satisfy my B, C, D, Iron and whatever else I have been missing!



Because before I was a vegetarian, all my levels were fine! I'm just sayin'!

Older Is Better In This Profession!


President of the United States!

That is the only profession where being older is actually a plus.

Think about it.

Obama was 46 when he was elected, and he was the second youngest president elect? People always said, "He is too young! He doesn't have enough experience. He is so young."

Wow! I wish in Hollywood they said that when you were in your 40s! That would be so awesome!

JFK was only 43, a baby!! An infant~


But hey take an actress over 35 and she is done! You wanna write for television better lie about your age and don't ever celebrate past 31-especially if you are a woman.

Advertising? You have to be in your 20s! Your twenties!

PR? 30 max.

You are smart but couldn't afford medical school when you were young, now you are in your thirties? FORGET IT! Most medical schools won't even accept students over 30, and practically no hospitals will accept interns at that age either.

Retire at 55 , or 65 is what we hear our entire lives. OLD is anything over 35, and don't even think about getting a new career in your 40s!

The good news is if you already work in your industry, you may be okay.

If you already work in entertainment-as long as you're not acting, you can survive as well. It's hard to break in after a certain age, but once you're in, you're in.

BUT if you really want to go for a job that it is better to be older. Run for president!!

Reagan-the actor-was almost 70!




In the midwest, you are definitely dead by 70, never mind retired, and in Hollywood forgotten-unless you are Betty White-but you can be president!!

What are you waiting for? Do it!

Finally a career that embraces your wisdom, knowledge, and wrinkles!

Thursday, June 10, 2010

Shimmy, Shimmy, Cocoa Pop. Shimmy, Shimmy, Rock!


"The space goes down, down baby, down, down the roller coaster. Sweet, sweet baby, sweet, sweet, don't let me go. Shimmy, shimmy, cocoa pop. Shimmy, shimmy, rock. Shimmy, shimmy, cocoa pop. Shimmy, shimmy, rock. I met a girlfriend - a triscuit. She said, a triscuit - a biscuit. Ice cream, soda pop, vanilla on the top. Ooh, Shelly's out, walking down the street, ten times a week. I read it. I said it. I stole my momma's credit. I'm cool. I'm hot. Sock me in the stomach three more times."


Can you believe it has been 22 years since BIG came out? TWENTY-TWO? Holyshit! The kids that played Billy and young Josh are now 36 years old! Older than Tom Hanks when he played Josh!

No way has it been 22 years? Is that possible? How did that happen? Really? It was that long ago?

I feel old-what the hell happened to my youth?

I guess living in New York, working as an actress, struggling as an actress, having an entire career in animation, working on more than 18 feature films, countless commercials and shorts, writing a novel, getting sued for that novel, writing another novel, and 3 more after that, spec TV shows, a screenplay, living Australia, Seattle, Florida, Milan, Copenhagen, not necessarily in that order! OMG!

I knew all this happened, but still feel like I am in my 20s until I see one of my fav films again and realize-that was 22 years ago????

Would I do it over again? Would I do it differently if I could?

There is a line in the film when Elizabeth Perkins tells Josh, "13? No, I've been there" and as a real grown up (OMG! I am actually old enough for people to call me ma'am, and I can't even get angry-*sigh*) I have to agree with her.

I wish that I could have all the experience I have now and yet go back to being young, older than when Big came out, but old enough to be carefree and not have to get eye check ups, my boob squished between to cameras, and a physical is only required for gym class~

Time flies! This said, I still love this film, it's friggen' timeless. Watch it, laugh, cry and enjoy it-it's a classic!

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

My Eye Has No Work Ethic!

Does anyone like going to the eye doctor?
I mean, it isn't the worst visit you can have: as far as doctor visits- go-Ladies? (Spread em!) Men? (Cough!) You know exactly what I mean! It can always be worse.

But, they put drops in your eyes to numb them, then they poke you in the eyes, and then more drops, and then basically you can't see for a few hours. I am just sayin'!

I went today and still have 20/20 vision, yay me! That said, drawings are fuzzy sometimes, so will be ditching the old glasses for a slightly stronger prescription than the one I have now, and reflective lenses-which will help with the under light, the over head light, the lights in my eyes all the live long day, when I am working on tiny details!

Ironically the worst part of assistant animation/clean-up is drawing eyes! Your eyes need to be perfect so your character's eyes are perfect.

When I was little, really little, 12 lbs or so, a month into life, the doctor told my mom I would be crossed eyed unless I got surgery. Well if you knew my mom, you would know what she said, but then again at 3, they told her the same. I guess I had a lazy eye. Her solution, a view master.




It totally worked! And until high school when sometimes the alcohol had the best of me, or if I was reeeeeeeeeeeeeally (see how many Es? That is a lot-for dramatic effect) tired, I would get double vision. Well now that doesn't happen, but sometimes the tiny details are hard to see. Apparently this same lazy eye is just well being lazy.

It is like, I am working, and it decides on it's own to take a nap and then I can't see perfectly, so it is what it is. Nice to know it isn't my age or anything.

&

And it was a great excuse to shop! :0)

I did not get a view master-but I did get new frames that look awesome on me!!

Monday, June 7, 2010

RENT AND IDIOT-True Story

RENT AN IDIOT

INT. TARGET STORE BURBANK CALIFORNIA - DAY
(RENT A COP, STEPHANIE)

STEPHANIE ATTEMPTS TO LEAVE STORE HAVING NOT PURCHASED ANYTHING

RENT A COP
Excuse me, can I see your receipt?
STEPHANIE
I don’t have a receipt, I didn’t buy anything.
RENT A COP
I need to see your receipt. (THEN) Ma’am.
STEPHANIE
I don’t have one.
RENT A COP
You can’t leave until you produce a receipt.
STEPHANIE
What?
RENT A COP
I need to see your receipt ma’am. What is it that you are not understanding?
STEPHANIE LOOKS AROUND TO SEE IF ASHTON KUTCHER HAS REVAMPED PUNK’D, BUT SEES NO ONE.
STEPHANIE
(SHAKES HEAD) Are you being serious?
RENT A COP
Of course. (THEN) Ma’am
STEPHANIE
Do you see any bags?
RENT A COP
No.
STEPHANIE
Okay then, you can clearly see that I haven’t bought anything.
RENT A COP
I need to see a receipt before you can leave the store.
STEPHANIE
So tell this to me like I am a two year old. In order to leave Target, I have to buy something?
RENT A COP
(LAUGHING) No, that would be ridiculous. (THEN) You just have to show me a receipt.
STEPHANIE
Okay. (THEN) Would you like to search my purse?
RENT A COP
I can’t do that ma’am. Just show me your receipt and you can leave.
STEPHANIE
I don’t have a receipt.
RENT A COP
Well then you can’t leave. I can’t let anyone leave until I see their receipt.
STEPHANIE
So I have to go buy something?
RENT A COP
If that’s the only way for you to get a receipt, then yes.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

My Review of Sex 2!

Oh why oh why? The Madonna look? How many times have we seen this? It was funny the first few hundred!

Hey everyone, as promised I wrote a review of Sex & The City 2, but it is on my other blog:

http://stephtvfilmwriter.wordpress.com/


While a couple of the shots made me laugh-they were expected, tired and played out.

Would Samantha, a PR wizard, really wear a dress so inappropriate for her age? While this was a funny scene, it again felt tired and pushed.

Since when is bad singing funny? And why when there is nothing funny to do, these painful scenes are put into films? This scene did NOT work for me.




Please swing by my other blog for my full review.


http://stephtvfilmwriter.wordpress.com/

Think Before You Speak-Cuz You Use Oil Too!

I am sure I am going to be hugely unpopular today for writing this, but I honestly can't stand it anymore!

Anyone who knows me even a little bit knows that I swing very left when it comes to most politics these days. I was a Republican for many years-I was raised that way- and I also believed it. I dubbed myself the real, and female, Alex P. Keaton. Seriously. Then I grew up, started reading A LOT and rolled to the left.

I am pretty opened minded and usually I will see that both sides offer good and both sides have extremists that ruin it for the whole lot.

Here is a perfect example of the extreme left wing nutters going too far-as if they don't use oil.

You have heard about the tragic oil spill a couple weeks ago brought on by what looks like the neglect and carelessness of BP ( British global energy company which is the third largest energy company and the fourth largest company in the world.)?

Of course you have. You have to be literally living under a rock to not have heard what is going on. It is truly awful, and I don't think anyone on either side will say anything less, but the lefties are going too far now.

I see posts all the time about how Obama doesn't care, that is so not the case, but I guess these crazy lefties haven't noticed what has been going on in Korea the last week and or the middle east? Obama has a lot of shit going on, and I think he is doing a great job handling it.

They, the lefties, are also taking it too far by saying, stop drilling off America's shores, and yet they don't want us taking oil from the middle east? Hrm? Now where should we get it?
As well, they are saying to stop using it and yet they climb into their SUVs and drive all over town. If they wanted to stop using oil, they could at any time this is a free country.

No blood for oil was a huge slogan when that moron Bush invaded Iraq, and while I think the war was a mistake: no blood for oil? Really?

Oil is used in our every day lives in many many ways, all over the world. The fact is, we need it, hence the fighting. (Don't get me started on the religious nut cases-that is another blog)

Here are some ways that we use oil every day and I challenge all the lefties to do without.

1) All plastic products (many of the materials used to make the clothes you wear, or the carpet you walk on, plus hundreds of the other products we take for granted) are made from petrochemicals. As the name implies, a main ingredient in petrocehmicals is oil.

2) Through refining, petroleum can be turned into many types of petrochemicals. One of these is synthetic (man-made) fibers, which can be woven into curtains and carpets. Man-made fibers are often wrinkle-free, so they look better. Many also do not absorb water, so mold and mildew are much less of a nuisance.

3) Some medicines, such as penicillin, are made by organisms, but most are manufactured from chemicals, and many of these are made from petroleum products. Acetylsalicylic acid, or ASA, is the active ingredient in many of the well-known, over-the-counter pain relievers. ASA is manufactured from petrochemicals. One of the first uses of oil, dating back thousands of years, was as medicine. Other early uses included illumination and as a boat resin to help keep ships sea-worthy.

4) Detergents are substances that act as cleansing agents when mixed with water. There are two main types of detergents: soapy and soapless. Most soapless detergents are made from oil products. The soapless detergents include powders and liquids used to wash clothes and dishes in a dishwasher. Some are made using petrochemicals, while others are made using alcohols and ethylene oxide that are petrochemical products.

5) Make-up, nail polish and lipstick are all made, at least partly, from oil. They are mixtures of such compounds as oils, waxes, perfumes, and colors, many of which can be made from petrochemicals. Nail polishes, for instance, are mixtures of pigments, solids, and solvents. The pigments give the polish its color, and the solids form the film that sticks to the nail and provides gloss and flexibility. Hair dye is also created using petroleum products.

Do you get the point? And of course, heating your homes, driving your car, etc.

So until you lefties are really ready to give all this up (and more) please shut up, enough is enough. It is getting really really old, tiresome and the rest of us sane people are sick of hearing how you think the whole world is full of criminals and no one cares but you.

Yes the BP spill is a tragedy, and yes they made a lot of mistakes, and it sucks, but you are using oil, so please think before you get on your soap box and or try living for even a week without anything that oil is a part of-good luck with that plan.

I'm just sayin'!

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Will I Do A Drawing For You?

*WARNING* this post riddled with sarcasm-meant to offend


Yes I have nothing better to do with my time and would LOVE to do you a drawing, or animate your brilliant script, and of course I can do it in less than a week. No problem. You want Disney quality? What else? And you are offering the chance to work on something "ground breaking" (I think you need to look that term up) Never mind that it takes a team of hundreds 2-4 years to do an animated feature, I can definitely do it by myself in just a matter of days. Of course because I believe that your script is better than anything out there. Even though, it isn't funny, the characters don't make any sense and no child would ever care about this story, you have it, I will animate it.

And I get to design the characters? WOW Bonus!

I get CREDIT? OMG! What a great deal thank you so much. I can't wait to add another credit to a list that is so long, I am dropping off projects.

You want me to "brand" you? You will send your new postcards out and everyone will see my work? What a great opportunity for me. I mean, never mind the 20 or so animated feature films I have worked on, 2-6 commercials a year, or shorts that are on the air where people see my drawings, having my drawing on your business card will put me into super stardom. Thank you for the opportunity, this is awesome!

A logo? For your product that will go out all of the world-that is, if and when you sell this idea you have-why would I want money for that? I love to draw, it's fun. I will get right on that.

You want a card for your loved one's birthday? Thick and thin lines, witty dialogue and full color-what? It's due THIS weekend? I have three whole days to get it done?

I really am so happy you are asking, me a professional artist, to work for free, because I love to draw, it's fun so why in the world would I expect to get paid?

Sorry that my actual job and life have gotten in the way of you taking advantage of me.