Thursday, December 3, 2009

Stupid Is As Stupid Does at the Bank

Seriously? Seriously! I am still reeling over the stupidity of the customer service reps that work the phones at one of my banks. I checked my balance today and noticed a large sum of money had been deposited in my account.
No I have not had an affair with Tiger Woods and was not expecting a pay out ;0)
I am honest and I called the bank to find out who, when and where this deposit came from.

Idiot number one, let's call him Forrest; "Um well, close your account and take the money, it's money." Then I swear to the baby Jaysus he made a Beavis and or Butthead-esque laugh. After a pause, I demanded to speak to a supervisor in charge. He argued w/ me for a minute and was trying to pronounce a word that I later realized was "electronic"...seriously and no, he was American, English as a first and very slow language. "The bank is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you are going to get!"

Idiot number two, let's call him George; "It isn't illegal to close your account and just take the money, my associate was just saying you should take it."

After a slur of curse words that I didn't even now I had the talent to string together ran through my head in a ticker-tape format, I calmly asked this guy to repeat what he had said because I couldn't believe my fucking ears.

He did repeat it, and I said, "tell this to me like I'm a two year old, you are saying I should close the account and take the money?"

Then George said that I could, it was my option and that there was fraud going on, and I explained that money was put in, not taken out and he told me that. . .and I am not that good of a writer to make this up. . ."fraud comes in all ways and I should take it, close the account and open a new account, or I will have to deal with filling out paperwork."

Neither of these two geniuses looked up my account, or anything.

To the people of the world,

This is the reason that the USA is in banking crisis, they hire people with IQs lower than a sponge and then wonder why things get fucked up.

I am just sayin'!


  1. "No I have not had an affair with Tiger Woods and was not expecting a pay out"

    I certainly hope not, I don't think Elin Woods is done with her golf club yet.

  2. Hahahahahaha, my ex in college is a golfer... I know that the entire PGA tour cheats, except for like maybe 5 of them....I went on tour with a friend for a few months and the stuff I saw those guys do and people think baseball players are bad!