Thursday, April 29, 2010

Keeping It Real

Ever hear someone say, "I'm just keeping it real"? Of course you have, we all have. It is the staple speak for the 20 somethings and early 30 somethings out there. The sad fact and truth here is that when someone says that, they are doing anything and everything but, keeping it real. Usually it means they are lying to you about something.

My most recent experience with this kind of, excuse me here, bullshit was when I went to join a local gym for the summer. I belong to a bigger, nicer, more expensive gym on the other side of town-Los Angeles-so it is not great when slammed with work to make that trek-but I digress.

I called up this local gym where my friend goes for a low $25 per month feel. If I went the entire year, at that rate, it would still be less than a couple months at the other club I belong to.

I am the easiest person to sell a gym membership to for many reasons, mostly because I don't need a sales pitch. I don't care about new equipment, etc. as long as it is clean, and you have good classes, I am there. The money isn't an issue since the other gym is the most expensive in the city.

But this wanker salesperson said to me, "I'm just keeping it real" about 15 times when he was lying so much he couldn't even keep track of his lies. Also he was talking "street" and said he was from Queens/Brooklyn, you know what I mean with the accent and all that, so I was expecting to see a certain type of person and when I got there he was a 40 something tall, midwestern white guy that was anything but "street". He basically put on that fake accent and all that hip hop talk because I mentioned I was from New York. I mentioned it to him when he immediately went into his sales pitch on the phone. I said, "Look I am from New York, I don't have time for all this, tell him how to join" he said, "oh oh, I'm down, I feel ya, I feel ya," ala Cuba Gooding-Jerry MacGuire-...


He was putting on an act, lying about everything, and was NOT keeping anything real.

The icing on the cake was that went I went in to sign up, even though the price changed daily and the lies were more than he could keep track off, I didn't because he told the biggest lie-he said I could pay for a few months at a time, cash and not have it come out of my checking account, or credit card, this was another lie. The price was $15 more a month than he said, and I had to link an account. This guy didn't keep anything real and he lost my business because of it.

So my warning to you is that when someone says, "I'm keeping it real" run in the other direction.

I am just sayin'!

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